Prayers...

FEMALE PRAYER

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.
Amen.


MALE PRAYER


I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a bass boat.
This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.
Amen.

Tortuga...

mmm tortuga......... Translation : My man does not need to eat turtle eggs to me Macho. Turtle eggs are not an aphrodiesac (sp?) .

I helped a friend move yesterday. Came home an took a nap.. that was nice. teh dog jumped in to bed at my feet and passed out. Woke up took an after noon shower and just chilled. It was in essence a lazy Sunday. Now I have go back to the dailey grind of working... boo hoo. - BTW picture has npthing to do with anything I just liked the way the flames looked.

Yup....

Been there ... done that.....

Gas wars....

Why does it feel like this when I go out to get gas? Mind you I drive a fairly efficeint car (a totota avalon ) 21c/30h. The Jeep is a little rougher 13/17h ((21 with my K and N filter)). Every two days I go out to check the tire pressure. Monthly I check the air filter and every week I check all the fluids. So I know my cars run top notch... But $60 fill up ? Come on its just not right. I know Im bitching and actually just blowing off steam. I also sell cars and I see these knuckle heads buying Hummers and big trucks as fashion plates. In less then 1 year they will come back crying and trying to sell their truck that no one wants to buy. ... A ford Excursion 44 gallon tank. At 2.80 / gal that equals ... about $123 per fill up and thats at about 10mpg...Arrrg lets get out of Iraq - lets watch China like a hawk (with a free market ((soon)) we will have another 500,000,000 drivers (China 1.2 billion people !!) So the need for gas will climb much much higher. I see $3.00 by 9/30......

the line and the dot...

This is a photoshopped photo. The cartoon that inspired this I Soooo loved. The music and the look and feel to this. Many times I have felt like the line that quite hasn't learned its true form.

Deafula.....

In english and in American sign language.....**LINKY**

Hey N/A..... Just for you - Bow before the Space Pope

In the flesh...

Why do zombies eat people? In several movies its all about the brains "It stops the pain of rotting." In the newest movie Dawn of the dead, the zombies ignored the dog and only wanted human prey. In the classic night of the living dead as well ass the comic book The Walking Dead the zombies ate a horse and in the movie they ate a mouse. Hmmm I have heard that human tastes similar to roasted pig. In the Pacific it (the flesh) has beed refered to as long pig. Hmmm what would it take to go cannibal? How long? Would you hunt your prey? Would you wait till some one passes like in the movie Alive?
If the Y2k event were to occus I think I could have done this with out thinking about it too much. I could not eat my friends because I know they eat like shit and would probally taste nasty - too fatty (FATTY FAT FAT !!) . - ANy how I'm off to lunch --- relax its an Italian Beef......

Monday Monkey ...

No, I did not forget the monkey ......

Hot for teacher

Hmmm I was thinking while waiting in line at the Target. I saw all the "Back To school" shit and a thought came to me. Was I ever hot for teacher? ... I think the answer was No. All the teachers that I had in grade school were all much older and most of the teachers in HS were men. There was one that I thought was cute. But she was dumb and I think that made her ugly. She was perky and blonde - young I think 21 or so. She was my accletated algebra teacher in HS. But 99% of the class were way ahead of her. I think that what put me off. I need to like a girls mind as well as body...... Were you ever hot for teacher? Let us know.

Punch in... punch out....

Ah work.... Can't get away from it (just yet). Its a necessary evil >I need stuff> I work to get stuff> Now I need (read:want) stuff> So I work more......... Actually this week has been really good to me. It seems that I have fallen in to several deals that took under an hour for me to make money on ((BTW I sell cars for a living)) . During the off time I hav e spent several hours on what and how to redecorate my garage.... I have had time to take a closer look at my benifits at work and have done some research on the education benifit program. My work will reimburse $2500/yr to go to school or up to $800 per class for full timers and $1500/yr for parts timers. I've decided to try it out and sign up for a motorcycle repair class (its an online/corespondence class) It runs about $600 or so , but work will pick this up. -- I feel like a dumb ass. I've been here for three years and have not used this before. I would like to finish my nursing degree , but to get in proper time in for those classes I would have to leave work. ... Im thinking on starting up the University of phoenix (its online) and just doing this at home. Not sure for what I have to research this alittle more. -- In the mean time its motorcycle repair -- I want to follow up with automotive repair. I can do most things on a car execpt electrical and transmission stuff. Again work would pay for this. -- Gunsmithing is also a class thats tought there..... Hmm Gunsmithing and motorcycle repair.... I think I now have a built in outlaw biker clientele. ... Back to work .....

The kiss that spans years.....

60 years since this kiss. V-J day 1945. I would love to have a kiss that the world would remember for 60 years.

War Vet...

War is a bitch just look at this guy....... Actually I've been watching a new show on TV called OVER THERE. its damn intense and sad. Sad because they are stories that can occus with our boys over there. Stories about wifes/girlfriends cheating on them while there off fighting. Losing limbs in combat etc. Real human stories in an inhuman time and place.

No news....

I have to stop watching the news. I know all I'm in for is depressing shit day after day. It's a habbit that I ipcked up from my Uncle is to watch the news before you go to bed. - I'll flick channels between Futuramma and the news, but its an every ay thing. -- I'm not going to ramble on about the War today. I know that most of you who read this feel the same way....

Hero's Inc......

If you can see He's smiling under the mask...Father and son*link*

El Santo......

The Mask........Behind the mask*LINK*

just off a bit...

This is kinda the way I've been feeling the past few days. Just a little off. Nothing wrong with Mr. T in a sombero , but somthing off about the whole thing. Maybe its working in the freeking heat thats getting to me. - Last night I had a very weird dream about a friend and had a headache all day because of it. Had aonther dream about another close friend but cant put that one together. Now you may ask whats the big deal... The big deal is that I don't generaly dream (i know we all dream ) I do not remember the dreams. When I do its in ver vivid texture , color and sound-- details like a picture. -- It seems when I do dream my sleep is way off. -- A few years ago I went to a sleep clinic to fully diagnose my sleep apnia. It was at a hospital and I had to sleep there. Well there were a few conditions.. 1 I would be wired up to several computers -- 9 wires in my scalp and one on my fingers. 2 they would video tape the whole 8 hour of me sleeping.... They found out a few things about me. #1 Most people take anywhere from 40 to 65 min to fall asleep in that environment. It took me 4 -- not a typo 4. #2 inside of 6 min I was in full REM sleep. -- I didnt remember any dreams that night either .. and I had 6 of them (recorded) .... ANy whooo Im off to bed to try this again.

OK ok --- its been way too long since I've put a monkey up. So here he is for your monkey pleasure.

Oh boy is this great.....

OK so I bought a mask of El santo. I found it on ebay. - It is the coolest. I grew up with Mexican Wrestling on the TV as a kid so this is kinda par for the course for me. I used to have a black and red one before - a kind of generic hero mask, but this is different. The El Santo is a legend. He has been in show business for 40 years and no longer does this. As a mater of fact his son now dons the mask. It's like having supermans cape. My son's have masks sent from the Motherland (Mexico). I for see a battle royale in the next few days once it gets here. I can't wait for UPS to get here.... *wink

Just a joke........ No more , no less.

A man goes into an adult entertainment shop and asks
the assistant for an inflatable doll.
"Would you like male of female?"
"Female, please."
"Would you like Black, or White?"
"White, please."
"Would you like Christian or Muslim?"
This question confused the man . . . and he replied,
"What has the religion got to do with it? It's an inflatable doll?"
"Well," explained the assistant, "The Muslim one blows itself up!"