outside. Way outside the normal range for this time of year. A little over
a year ago I was in Ohio for my birthday. Cold. Dark. Rainy. Foul. I sat in
a hotel with a large domino's ham pizza, liters of coke and a box of little
fudggys. It was kinda depressing. This year my knuckle head friends took me
out for drinks and a Mexican meal. Too many drinks and much much food was
had. Some dark drinks followed ahhhh real beers. Anyways tomorrow I have to
force my self to put the yard items away and get ready for the real fall
weather. In less than 5 days it will be 58 degrees or colder with lots of
rain to follow. Its going to get cold fast. ....As depressing as it is I
love that weather. Its real to me. Alive. Ever Changing.
****************************************shift**********************************
In a recent letter I was asked by a friend if I has a birthday
wish what/who would it be. Let me blow the candle out and think a bit.
Outside of the usual $1,000,000,000, fame, power , houses and cars I really
don't know. One more night with her? One night , one minute, one second. A
kiss can change the world. I miss her , not in a crazy obsessive
psycho kind of way,but when the night is still and the late
Summer/Fall comes around I think about having a beer with her and the
things that followed. A hand hold and light touch, a smile and a
blush. She would lean in and kiss me on the lips..... Would I want a
night in Vegas? New Orleans?Memphis? Outside in the Grand Canyon? San
Fran? A sex club? B&D? S&M? Would I want a 7 course meal with great
wines, drinks and desserts? 3 nights in a spa? A bath in melted
chocolate?
Would I want to finish my tour of all 50 States? Tour of the World?
Dinner with the Dali Lama? Pee on the wailing wall? Kill a man with my bear
hands? (just checking if you were paying attention). Would I want to do a
redo in life? 1 yr? 2 yrs? 5 yrs? 10 yrs? Would I want to be 35? 30? 25? 21
again? 25 was not too bad, I was slimmer and the world was a different
place. Things were good then. I was still free in spirit and time.
Surrounded by different friends that I miss dearly. Granted I almost died that
year, but it was a good year. What would I want? What would I want? Do want
any thing any more in life? Would I wish to finish my degree? One
wish. Its sad I
can't think of one wish for myself. Aladdin had three and I can't come up
with one that I would just enjoy guilt free. This is bad... Its like
I'm thinking of the
would of's , could of's and should of's. Enough of that. No regrets. As for
Birthday wishes, you can't say otherwise it won't come true.
************************************Shift.**********************************************
I've been watching this seasons TV and enjoying some shows; Heros,
Bionic Woman, Pushing up daisys , Smallville, Supernatural and Reaper. All
enjoyable and some will do well some will fall by the wayside. Reaper
reminds me of BRIMSTONE from FOX only much much lighter and funnier. Battle
Star will start soon and I do hope its good. It is its final season. Finish
when your on top. Seinfeld know how to do it (bad ending).
I really need to go out and seen a killer movie. One that will stay with me
for awhile. I have not seen that in quite a bit. The last movie that I
needed to see over and over was Dawn of the Dead. I'm looking forward to
Diary of the Dead by Romero. That should be killer. As far as I understand
its a re-do on the whole zombie legend. The Zombie Diary was not too bad.
That one was from the UK; think 28 days later + The Blair Witch project.
Low budget, but fun.
I have taken pictures all this week of what I have eaten. Its
a hard thing to do. I have only missed photos of 2 meals in the last 4
days. Having the camera at home and at work ready to go when you about to
eat. People at work give me a sideways glance when I take a snap shot.
Portion control is a bear. I'm so used to extra portions, biggie this ,
biggie that and double stacks that a real portion seems so small. Like I'm
being cheated. I saw a photo of MC Donalds sodas in a photo. The photo
showed that what is the mid size soda was one the large soda 15 + years
ago. The small soda became the kids drink everything became bigger. Now
every thing is 32 oz or bigger. Way more that is needed for a meal. I
almost think that people have forgotten what its like to be hungry. Its not
a bad feeling to know. Its hard to control but not impossible. People in
the US want instant gratification. The quick pill "Trim spa baby!!". That
corpse was a spokes person for that pill. How many did she take and how
much lipo? I need to get down to a decent weight or at least lower in fat
%. There is a guy at work that is much shorter than me who had the stomach
band surgery. He is much shorter than me and at one time he weighed close
to 600 lbs. Thats twice what I weigh right now. Thats massive. How much pain
was he in? How was his life? Anyways thats enough for now. Take care.
Peace.
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